I am married. I love it. More than I ever thought I could. I live with my best friend. We eat popcorn on the couch and laugh a lot. I live in Tulsa now. I miss Reno, of course, especially Stones. I am pursuing the Lord, as much of my time is unplanned, unstructured, uninterrupted. What does the Lord have now?

Tomorrow

You think you know where you life is headed, the overarching plan, the goals you have in place, lined out month by month, year by year, decade by decade (okay...maybe that's a little extreme), but you know the plans you have in place and then BAM! it all changes. October 1st my life changed drastically. In a good way. What this has done for me is put me into a place where I see every day as a gift, where I love those in my life in this moment, and I appreciate that nothing is ours to hold onto forever.

You do not know what your life will be like tomorrow... (from James)

You do not know what is going to come into your life tomorrow, so appreciate what you have today. Don't miss the moment. And who knows, maybe what will come tomorrow will make every your craziest dreams come true (like my tomorrow did).

Full Out

My little brother is about to earn his second degree blackbelt on Thursday night. They use this phrase in Tae Kwon Do, "Full Out," to describe putting one's whole self into the goal to be achieved. This is one of those days when I am reminded that this concept of going "full out" isn't just an athletic idea, but can be applied to anyone's life. What would it mean to go "full out" in your life? What would it mean to go "full out" in mine? For sure it means investing my whole heart and mind in the things I was created to do on this earth in order to bring about wholeness and peace and joy and freedom because I have been given these things when Christ rescued me. That statement though stops at ideology unless I put into practice in my every day life. It means that in the practical every day things, as well as, in the broad impact areas of my life I make the choice to invest all of myself. This past month, I have sensed a renewal of a challenge to live "full out"!

Happy

Okay...I know it is quite a jump from "Dark Nights of the Soul" to "Happy." The thing is that the dark night of the soul is often what opens the door to a different facet of happiness that has not been observed before. This is the case today. I am ecstatic about the freshness and challenge of so many aspects of my life right now. This freshness and challenge, though, would not be here had the dark night (or shall I say nights) not been apart of me first. My happiness is an indirect result to the various levels of struggle over the last year. My soul is soaring because it has been wrestling for the last twelve months. I am overwhelmed today with how incredible life can be! And I am in awe of the divine working of God in these details of my life.

Dark Night of the Soul

Matt Chandler often refers to a "dark night of the soul." Rob Bell talks about the "long hard work of the soul." The Bible talks about these times as "pruning": "I am the true vine, and my Father is the gardener. He cuts off every branch that bears no fruit, while every branch that does bear fruit he prunes so that it will be even more fruitful (John 15:1-2)." Think about this...the branch that is bearing fruit gets pruned...that means that the person who is already walking out how Jesus says we should live is the one who is going to have things cut away from his or her life...so that more can be done with it.

Often that pruning season of life (of the multiple pruning seasons of life) are difficult and painful. The pruning, though, is not the end result...even though in the midst of it, it often feels as though nothing more will happen beyond that moment. It is the struggle of those dark nights of the soul that carry out the work of God in our lives. "Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope (Romans 5:3-4)."

Consider the outcome of your dark nights of the soul. Consider who you are becoming through doing the long hard work of the soul.

Tomorrow

There is a line in the Baz Luhrmann song "Everyone's Free (to Wear Sunscreen)" that says, "The real toubles in life are apt to be things that never crossed your worried mind; the kind that blindside you at 4pm on some idle Tuesday." Which I think is actually a very Biblical concept. Stick with me on this...

"Why, you do not even know what will happen tomorrow. What is your life? You are a mist that appears for a little while and then vanishes." James 4:14.

You have had those moments...those moments that blindside you...and your life changes forever. What are we supposed to do with those moments? What do those moments teach us? There is so much more to say about those moments, but what I am learning today about responding to the blindsiding moments are the following two things:

When you understand that you do not know what will happen tomorrow, you learn to not hold on too tightly to anything. When we hold too tightly to things that disappear tomorrow, not only are blindsided, but the recovery time is longer. When we hold lightly to things that disappear tomorrow, we find that we come back from being blindsided much more quickly.

Second, when we understand that all of this can change tomorrow...that something that we've never considered could come up out of the blue tomorrow and change our entire lives...we learn to appreciate the moments we are presently in, the good things we have been blessed with today.

Thoughts for you...What has blindsided you this year? How has it impacted your life?

To close, Top 5 Songs for Confusing Moments:

"Ironic" by Alanis Morisette
"Most of the Time" by Bob Dylan
"Love Will Come Through" by Travis
"Trouble" by Coldplay
"All I Need" by Mat Kearney

World

The men and women in this world whom I admire are the ones who live the message of Christ with their whole lives, not just with their words nor their "churchy" culture. These people whom I admire are the ones who have taken account of all they have been given and all they are capable of and go out in the world to help, assist, give, serve, and develop. Two of these phenomenal people run NGO's (non-governemental organizations) in Africa. Daniel runs Transformed International in Kenya. He actually helps orphans and widows by creating opportunities for them to support themselves within their own culture. Michelle runs Fount of Mercy in Uganda. Michelle connects American groups with established NGO's in Uganda in order to assist those various NGO's in their goal of community development. Not only do Daniel and Michelle seek to assist those in need, but they also seek to connect those who have been given much with those in need, thus transforming both spectrums of the world. I applaud Daniel and Michelle and others like them. To read more about what they actually do, check out www.transformedinternational.org (Daniel's organization) and www.fountofmercy.org (Michelle's organization).